Thankful......and Exhausted!

As I lie in bed at just 7:30 on this lovely Black Friday evening, I feel thankful. But so, so tired! It's fine. Shulamith assured me that it's fine; it's okay to be simultaneously thankful and exhausted after three full days of holiday celebrations. First.... the thankful!

I'm thankful that four of our five children live here in the Salt Lake Valley: Isaiah in Salt Lake City, Seth in Orem, Eli in Herriman, and Shulamith just around the corner. They were all here Wednesday afternoon and evening, as we celebrated "Fakesgiving" (aka Thanksgiving one day early) in order to accommodate their various schedules. And not only that; they all slept overnight here, so we had even more time together. 

I'm thankful for their friendship with each other. Four diverse personalities they are, but one unbreakable bond connects them. You can feel it when they're together, and it's my happiest of happy places.

I'm thankful for their friendship with me. I know that some children grow up, make their own lives, and see their parents only occasionally. These four are some of my closest friends, and I see them often. This is a gift I never take for granted.

I'm thankful for the two who married our children, Mathew (Shulamith) and Amanda (Eli). Matt brings his unique humor and love for all things awkward; life would not be the same without him. Amanda is the "girl" Shulamith and I always dreamed of and wished for. 

(Before much celebrating began, Amanda and I made a Diet Coke run. Shulamith had this great idea that if we each bought two, they would last the whole day. Brilliant!)

I'm thankful all these amazing people are sealed to us by covenant. My anxiety causes me to worry more than non-anxious moms, and I'm working on that, but I know they will be with me eternally. I recently had a sign made for our home, after studying/teaching the Book of Proverbs. It is Proverbs 31:21 and reads, "She is not afraid of the snow for her household: for all her household are clothed with scarlet." Indeed!

Next... the exhausted!

Wednesday was devoted to cooking, cleaning, and decorating. Shulamith's daughter, Kennedy, was here all day, and thank goodness she was because I couldn't have done it without her. She literally decorated our entire house by herself, including climbing a ladder to trim the very tall tree. Then she made stuffing and helped me prepare and baste the turkey hourly throughout the day. Dinner was good; everything turned out well. Afterwards, we played "The Game of Things," and  (wait for it.......), I actually won! I never, ever, win. Board games are just another of the hundreds of things I suck at, so this victory needs to be memorialized here in this blog.

Thursday (aka the real Thanksgiving), I got up and made breakfast for everyone, bacon and cinnamon streusel french toast. Then we headed out to see a movie: The Glass Onion: A Knives Out Mystery, and I'm pretty sure those were the only 120 minutes I sat down in the whole three days. Movie was good, not great, but good. Then back home to make soup from the turkey carcass. It was also good, not great, but good. In Isaiah's words, "Tastes just like everything else we ate growing up, bland!" Yep, cooking is on that list of hundreds of things I suck at. Later, though, Eli fried scones for everyone to eat while the bros played video games, and those were actually great! Thank you, Eli. 

By 10:30 last night, I was wiped. Isaiah and I were playing with Eli's one-year-old baby, Jane, but I had to take her back downstairs to her parents, so I could fall desperately into bed. Because the following day...today(!)...would be arguably the best day of the year: BLACK FRIDAY!! It's true. Shulamith and I look forward to this day with excitement and anticipation all year long, as we stash cash away in envelopes and dream of hot chocolate, Diet Coke, crowds, Christmas music, and an entire day of shopping! 

We set alarms for 7:00 a.m., dressed quickly, and I was at her house by 7:20. We hit Target, Costco, Fashion Place Mall, Ulta, and Deseret Book, with lunch at Cheesecake Factory in the middle, a seriously awesome and productive Black Friday!

And now I lie here in bed, thankful and exhausted, beyond ready for some "me" time, some down time, some time to read the second half of The Alice Network, which has taken a backseat recently to dumb essays that need grading. But not tonight. 

Finally, I am thankful for all of you my dear readers and friends, every one.

Happy Election Day!

At our house, election day is a holiday! This is especially true in presidential election years, but yes, we even gather to celebrate the midterms. This is mostly because both Gerald and Isaiah love politics, but the rest of us are definitely more engaged than most, as evidenced by the fact that Isaiah's boss was only vaguely aware an election even occurred Tuesday, and she had no idea what was on the ballot or even if this was a presidential year. Not kidding.

I was worried about how the night might go. There was far too realistic a chance that Republicans might win back the Senate. They didn't. I am so grateful! Based on current numbers, they will likely take the House, but assuming things shake out as expected, Dems will retain the Senate, and with VP Harris' vote, President Biden will still be able to accomplish good things, as he has thus far. He won't have an easy two years, but hope remains. He might turn out to be the best president of my lifetime, and that's saying a lot because I'm pretty fond of President Obama. 

These two were glued to the TV and to their laptops throughout the evening, as they always are on election night:

The rest of us were in and out, asking for updates and clarification. Isaiah, who (according to Seth), knows "everything about everything," told us about all the close races, the candidates, and the expected results. As numbers came in, we watched several key states closely--Arizona, Georgia, Nevada, Pennsylvania--hoping for Democrat victories. 

I went to bed around 10:00 p.m. because I'm kind of a wimp like that; Gerald and Isaiah were up until the wee hours. I awoke to a text from Isaiah: "Dr. Oz has LOST." Go Pennsylvania! My friend who lives there said it was way too close, but still, I'll take the win. Glad to have a guy like John Fetterman in the Senate, especially considering the alternative.

As for Utah, we had a glimmer of hope that Evan McMullin might succeed in unseating Mike Lee, but that glimmer faded all too quickly as the numbers came in. I guess we didn't have enough babies (Lee's solution to global climate change). Regardless, Dems will likely retain the Senate majority, so I'm a happy girl.

Until next time....Happy Election Day!

Birthdays, ballots, and boosters!

October is the best month. For many reasons. It means the heat of summer comes to an end, and the brisk fall air returns. The possibility of rain increases! The holiday season begins. And I get to celebrate my birthday!

This year, that celebration went on for about a week. It began on Oct. 14th, when as one of my presents, I asked any of my kids who wanted to, to attend the temple with me. Shulamith and Eli agreed; Amanda agreed too, but her little Jane was still recovering from being sick, so Amanda decided not to leave her. The three of us participated in proxy sealings at the Oquirrh Mountain Temple, followed by dinner at Red Robin. It was delightful, start to finish. I love being in the temple with my kids.

My actual birthday is on the 20th, so that day, Shulamith and Amanda and I went for lunch at Raising Cane's. Our plan was to celebrate with the whole family the upcoming Sunday evening, so I thought that was plenty, but Amanda insisted that I could not be alone on the evening of my actual birthday, so she and Eli and I, along with their little Jane, went to Olive Garden. Super fun!

Finally, Sunday the 23rd, we hoped to have everyone together for dinner at Texas Roadhouse, but Shulamith's son Theodore was still recovering from his recent tonsillectomy and feeling not so great, so Matt stayed home with him. Isaiah and Seth were with us, so I had four of my five kids, and it was awesome. They gave me a gift card to Journey's, so I could order some Dr. Martin's! Exactly what I wanted (Thanks, Shulamith!).

I am no longer the only October birthday in our extended family. Two days ago, Eli and Amanda's little girl, Jane Eliza, celebrated her 1st birthday in amazing style! Amanda decorated the club house on our property to reflect their "One-derful" baby girl and to celebrate big time how one year ago, they welcomed Jane into their family. The first year of a child's life brings so much joy and so many challenges, all at the same time. Amanda wrote on the invitation to Jane's party that part of the celebration was because "Mommy and Daddy survived." Yes, yes they did. They survived chronic sleep deprivation, early issues with jaundice and breastfeeding (which Amanda navigated like a boss), and even Jane's first ever illness, which came just prior to my birthday (see above). But no, they did not simply survive. Eli and Amanda are crushing this parenting gig. They have raised a healthy, happy, hilarious, opinionated, and enormously well-loved one-year-old human!

In addition to two birthdays, October also brings the final stretch into midterm elections. I know I say this every time, but this is an important one, my friends, particularly for those who live here in Utah. This time, there is an actual chance, a fair shot even, to replace one of our current U.S. Senators, who literally stood on the senate floor and claimed that the solution to global climate change can be found in "churches, wedding chapels, and maternity wards....because the real solution to climate change is babies!" Don't believe me? Here it is! Now I'm not a huge fan of Evan McMullin; he's far too conservative for me. But folks, come on! We have a chance to finally escape ridiculously stupid rhetoric like what you see above. Please vote for Evan!

Finally, for me, October brings my annual flu vaccine, and this year, my Bivalent COVID booster. This one targets Omicron sub-variants, AND the original COVID-19 strain, in a single shot. Run, don't walk, to get yours. 

Today, we party hard for Halloween 2022, with parades, pizza dinner, trick-or-treating, and way too much candy. 

Tomorrow, let the Thanksgiving/Christmas season begin!

Fabulous Freedom Friday!

I am in so many ways a duplicate copy of my grandma. No, I don't look anything like her, but we share other more important qualities. She loved her "down time." She loved to lounge in her bed until late in the morning, sip her coffee, eat her slightly burned toast, and study her Christian Science weekly scripture lesson. If you sub Diet Coke for the coffee, and "Come Follow Me" for the Christian Science lesson, the two of us might as well be twins! She didn't always have the luxury of lounging. For nearly a decade in the 1940s, she was a single mom and worked full time in an envelope factory in order to care for herself and my mom. But in 1953, she married the love of her life, and from that point on, she lounged pretty much every morning.

I think of her often, especially on those mornings that I don't have to set an alarm, when I can wake up on my own terms, sneak downstairs to grab an ice cold Diet Coke, burn some toast, then return to my bed and dive right into the "Come Follow Me" lesson for the week. Yesterday was such a day, a Fabulous Freedom Friday, I like to call them. This semester, Friday is my only day that is fully free. The other six days all include places I need to go, classes I need to teach, meetings I need to attend, stuff I need to do. I keep my Fridays free, and they are sacred. 

Yesterday I awoke around 8:10 and lounged in my bed for 20 minutes, dreaming of the day ahead in which my calendar was entirely blank. Lots of people thrive on being as busy as is humanly possible. I am not one of those people. Like Grandma, I love my down time. At 8:30 I met Shulamith for our first walk of the day; we did three miles, so around 6,000 steps. Then I returned home and worked on this week's "Come Follow Me" lesson, the last one from Isaiah. Everyone in my family is a bit weary of listening to me talk about the Old Testament. But really. How can I not? Especially when we're reading Isaiah! This week he teaches so brilliantly on two prominent elements of our faith: the Law of the Fast and the Temple Garment. We don't get to have a Gospel Doctrine class tomorrow, but trust me, you want to read these chapters, at least 58-61.

Mid-morning, Shulamith and I took her kids to visit the Witches at Gardner Village (an annual tradition), followed by yummy treats at Schmidt's Bakery. And we were still home by mid-afternoon, with plenty of time to continue my lounging activities. I graded a few papers, watched the most recent episode of The Patient, and emptied the 10 garbage cans throughout our house. That might not seem like a "loungy" thing to do, but for me, newly-emptied garbage cans are the happiest!

In the evening, Eli's one-year-old baby, Jane, came over to visit. Shulamith and I took her on a long walk, our last of the day; then Jane and I did some serious lounging all by ourselves as we sat on the floor, ate strawberries and Cheerios, and watched Cocomelon, which is hands down the stupidest show ever created, but it's Jane's favorite. She's one, so we'll let it slide.

And that ended my Fabulous Freedom Friday for this week, and I just wanted to share it with you. Thank you, Grandma, for teaching me that it's okay to lounge, that down time is a good thing and that self care is important. 

Love is stronger than anger...maybe?

Of course it kinda depends on why I'm angry. If someone messes with one of my five kids, I morph into a ferocious mama bear, the likes of which you can be grateful you've not experienced, and my capacity for love disappears right down the toilet.

That happened this past week. My favorite child, Seth, was the target of some unjust, unscrupulous behavior. As a young college student with limited resources, he was blatantly taken advantage of.

And I am furious!

[Aside: if you wonder how I can refer to Seth as my "favorite child," rest easy. In my ongoing study of the Book of Isaiah, one of the wonderful things I've come to understand is that I am God's favorite. Everyone is. Every single one of us. We are all God's favorite. What splendid, splendid truth! Through my awakened definition the phrase "favorite child," I can now emphatically declare that all five of my kids are my favorite.]

Back to Seth. On Wednesday, he woke up and went out to his car to find a boot on one of the wheels. A notification explained that Seth had not renewed his parking permit at his apartment. He didn't realize he needed to renew the permit, and no reminders were sent out. He immediately went to the apartment office to ask what to do. They informed him he would need to pay $70 to get the boot removed. They told him there was nothing they could do for him and that he should have kept track of when to renew his permit. 

He had class all day and into the evening, so he decided he would deal with this the next morning, but when he woke up Thursday, his car was gone! It had been impounded and towed away. This was less than 24 hours since he first learned there was a problem, and the people at the apartment office failed to mention that if he didn't pay to get the boot removed immediately, the car would be towed by the following morning. That would have been the kind, honorable thing to do, don't you think? 

And how much would it cost to get his car back? $320! Yes, you read that right. How is it even legal to take advantage of people, with ridiculously inflated fees like this? Seth works so hard at his job as a server at Chili's; $320 is a huge amount of money to him. I'm busy drafting my damning Google review of this apartment complex that obviously cares nothing for its residents, who are almost all young college students working their way though school. 

But love is stronger than anger. And it turned my attitude around just a little.

Entirely unrelated to Seth's sad experience is another story. Raging mama bear that I am, I was still so angry yesterday morning, as I drove up to my friend Emily's house to hang out with her one more time before she delivers her baby boy this Friday. The last time she had a baby was in late February, 2020. I got to hold him only once before the world shut down. By the time we felt safe doing anything other than going for social distanced walks outside, her Jeffrey was over a year old! Needless to say I am super excited to snuggle this new little guy, but that's not the point of this story.

When I walked into Emily's house yesterday, greeted at the door by both Evelyn and Jeffrey, I found Emily, nine months' pregnant, on the couch working tirelessly on a tedious project that involved cutting little pieces of sticky paper to various sizes and strategically placing them throughout a hard cover book. Say what???

Several months ago, the prequel to The Hunger Games series was released, a book called The Ballad of Songbirds and S#####. One look at the cover, and I knew I wouldn't be able to read it. Just like I can't read Harry Potter. Or watch the movies. I am an ophidiophobe . I have the most intense, irrational fear of those long, limbless reptiles than anyone I know, though my brother is a close second, and no, we have no idea why we share this phobia. I tried reading the first Harry Potter book once, but 90 pages in, I was so anxious and uncomfortable I had to stop. Sad, too, because I was also already invested in her marvelous writing and cool story.

Anyway, Emily I and talked about the Hunger Games prequel: 

"Even the cover displays one of those dang creatures! No way I could read it," I complained.

"What if I covered the "Rated S" parts? Emily suggested.

"That sounds like a ton of work. It's fine. I read 3-4 books a month as it is; I don't need to read this."

But she decided to do it anyway. As she read the book, she marked with a light pencil dot the pages that included graphic descriptions of those things; then she went back and cut little pieces of paper with sticky backs, just the right size to cover only the forbidden words, phrases, and sentences. This reminded me of what I had to do in college when I took biology and psychology. I cut pieces of construction paper to cover the pictures in the vertebra animals chapter and the desensitization chapter of my bio and psych textbooks, respectively.

But what Emily did was so much harder. It wasn't pictures she was covering (except on the front cover); it was tiny words, no more than an 11# font. So, so much work. While she was pregnant. Very pregnant. And caring for two other children. And preparing her house for a 3rd child. And running a school book fair. 

So now I can safely read this book. Here is what the new and greatly improved cover looks like:

And the spine:

In most cases, the coverings are small and look like this:

But occasionally, she had to cover almost the whole page (!), and in those cases, she left me little notes to explain things I would need to understand, minus the s#####.

So you see, this story has two distinct parts, with seemingly no connection at all. And yet, they weave together as I consider my rage over Seth's situation with his evil apartment owners, redirected almost instantly by Emily, who without even knowing it, turned my attitude to gratitude. 

Am I still mad? Yes. These people hurt my favorite Seth. But I'm also profoundly grateful to have a friend like Emily. Others might laugh at my stupid phobia, because really.....a grown woman who can't read words on a page without falling apart? It's freakin' hilarious. It helps that Emily isn't fond of these creatures either, though her fear is nowhere near as irrational as mine. 

Regardless, everyone should have a friend like Emily. I'm so thankful I do.

"It's a shoebox, but it's MY shoebox!"

The history of Isaiah's living situations is not without drama. Let's just say he has terrible luck with roommates. After dealing with an especially awful one, he came home to live with us a few years ago. He was traveling so much for his job that it made more sense to stay with us than pay rent when he was only in town half the time. Then COVID hit and the travel abruptly ended, and a few months later we moved to the Bluffdale wilderness. That was nearly two years ago, and Isaiah is more than ready to be on his own. I can't blame him. It's time. Hard to have a social life when you live with your parents. Most of Isaiah's friends live in downtown Salt Lake, and Bluffdale is even farther from downtown than Sandy was.

After several months of searching for the right place at the right price, he found a cute, studio apartment just a few blocks west of Temple Square. It's small for sure, only 300 sq. ft, but it's super nice (only a couple years old) and has everything he needs, even a nice washer and dryer! We helped him move in this past week. It's easy to move a minimalist; he barely has anything! One stop at IKEA to buy a desk and TV stand, then Target to get a few necessary household items, and he was good. 

Sadly, he only got to stay there less than a week before flying to Cleveland. He'll be there this week, then home for a few days before going to Denver. But he'll eventually get his apartment set up. He loves it already, especially the fiber internet, and I'm so happy for him. 

And yet...

I already miss him so much. I'm used to having him away, traveling for both work and pleasure, but now that he's gone permanently, my mama heart feels sad. There's so much to miss about Isaiah. He's the easiest person to live with. He asks for almost nothing but offers so much. He's my #1 source for all news and current events along with everything in history. "Isaiah, tell me in 5 minutes what's going on with________________." And he does. Because he knows everything. (He hates it when I say that, but it's almost true!) In Seth's words: "How does he know absolutely everything? I don't get it!"

I will also miss his Asian cooking. He doesn't do it often, but when he does, the food is so good. But he packed up his wok and cooking tools, and I boxed up all his Asian ingredients, and now that yummy cuisine will be created in his little kitchen all the way downtown. Shulamith and I are waiting for an invite, Isaiah.

More than his cooking, I will miss his singing. My sons all have beautiful singing voices, which is beyond shocking if you've ever heard Gerald or me sing. I can barely blend with a choir and only if I have a strong vocalist singing the part right in my ear, and Gerald has never hit a correct note in his entire life. But by some marvelous miracle, my boys sing well, and Isaiah has the loveliest tenor voice. I love hearing him sing as he goes through the course of everyday tasks.

Mostly, I'll just miss his presence daily in our home. It's a positive, inspiring presence. True, he is the smartest person I know, but more importantly, Isaiah is kind and funny and adorable. And he's already so happy in his new apartment, that all I can be is so happy for him.

In his words: "It's a shoebox, but it's MY shoebox!"

Off to school we go!

When Seth was little, he was so jealous because it seemed to him that everyone else got to go to school, while he was stuck home with me. It was true! Luke and Shulamith were in high school; Isaiah and Eli were in elementary school. I taught one evening class at Skagit Valley College, so even I got to go to school! Seth thought "school" must be the most exciting place, and he felt terribly cheated that he couldn't go.

Fast forward 20 years, and it's surprising how many of us are still in school. 

Seth began his junior year at Utah Valley University this past week, majoring in sociology and minoring in criminal justice. Turns out he likes school as much as he thought he would when he was a toddler and too young to go. He loves his soc classes, but this semester, Intro to Criminal Law might be winning the "favorite class" award. 

Cutest college student!

Eli also began the school year this past week, teaching 4th grade at Ridge View Elementary in Herriman, about 2 minutes from their house. He has 24 kids and teaches in a portable classroom because this school is growing like crazy! "So far, so good," he reports. "Kids seem nice."

Cutest 4th grade teacher!

Shulamith is teaching two classes at SLCC, both ENGL 900, developmental reading and writing. She has mostly taught night classes in the past when Matt is home, but now that her youngest is in morning kindergarten, she is teaching four mornings. I'm so grateful she has been able to be home with all her kids through their pre-K years; it's been a sacrifice for her and Matt but absolutely worth it!

Cutest college instructor!

I don't have a picture, but Luke works as a psychologist in the Maryland Public Schools, so he's technically still in school too! 

Finally, my fall semester began this week at both UVU and SLCC. Sad that my UVU classes are opposite days from Seth's, so we won't ever see each other. I have three classes at each school for a total of six, which is ridiculous. (Emily, I know you are saying "Why did you do this to yourself again? Last fall you said you would never do this again?") I don't know the answer; I truly don't. I want to go to the Holy Land and I need money to do that? That's the best I got.  Anyway, all six classes are ENGL 1010: three face-to-face, two hybrid, and one livestream broadcast. I already feel overwhelmed by it all, but ready or not, here we go.

Final hair and makeup check before first class!

Education is important in our family. Gerald and I set a goal long ago to help all five kids through their undergrad degrees as much as we possibly could, assuming they chose to go to college. They did. We now have four college graduates (bachelor's degrees) and one PhD (Luke), and Seth is halfway to his bachelor's. Hooray!

And in other news related to education, our amazing President Biden just forgave $10,000 of student loan debt for Isaiah and even more for Eli's wife, Amanda. We are so grateful! We don't hear a lot about him; he's not up in the middle of the night bullying people on social media. He's just hard at work, doing what he said he'd do, making positive change for middle-class Americans. Very possibly the best president in my lifetime.

And there you have it, our fall 2022 back-to-school report and pics.