140. Jane: Her Her, I went to the doctor today. I'm still four.
141. Jane was struggling with her big emotions and melting down.
Amanda: Jane, tell me what is wrong,
Jane: (only screaming)
Amanda: Jane, I need you to use words to tell me what is wrong.
[Later]
Amanda: I couldn't help you because you weren't telling me what was wrong.
Jane: I was telling you in my head.
142. Jane [to Eli after he tried to console her by saying "It's okay" after she'd been crying for 10 minutes]: I don't want to hear "It's okay" anymore! If you say "It's okay" again, then I won't be with you! Only Mom.
143. Amanda: Where is my phone? It was right here on the couch next to me. Jane, do you know where my phone is?
Jane: Maybe it's in my doctor kit.
[Eli looks in Jane's doctor kit and pulls out Amanda's phone.]
Amanda: Why is my phone in your doctor kit?
Jane: I forgot it was your phone.
144. Jane has been sick the past couple of days with a viral ear infection.
Jane: Mom...I think you're doing everything I want.
Amanda: Well yeah kinda. When you're sick, I just want to make you feel happy. You get to be kinda spoiled when you're sick.
Jane: I like being spoiled.
145. At age 4, Jane is busy figuring out the world. A couple days ago, I was at Jane's house, talking to Eli on the phone.
Jane: Why did you call Daddy "Sweetie"?
Me: Because he's my baby, and I love him very much.
Amanda: Her Her is Daddy's mommy, so she loves him a lot.
[Then last night]
Me: Can I have some of this trail mix?
Jane: It's Daddy's treat.
Me: Well, can I still have some?
Jane (to Eli): Can Her Her have some of your treat?
Eli (joking): Nope.
Jane: You should be nice to your mommy.
146. Jane has a wonderful, assertive personality. As a result, she sometimes gets mad at
Amanda, the safest person in her life. She got mad at her yesterday and stormed into the other room. Soon, Amanda heard her singing.
Jane (singing): I am not going to live with yooooooouuuuuuu. I am going to go awaaaaaayyyyyy.
147. Jane made a paper sombrero and a paper taco at preschool in celebration of Cinco de Mayo. She put the sombrero on her stuffed dog and taco in its lap. Later she walked by the dog and noticed the sombrero had fallen off, and she was convinced that I took it off. I didn't. Like why would I do that?
Jane: Who took the sombrero off my dog?
Me: I don't know, Jane, maybe the wind blew it off.
Jane: Did you take it off?
Me: No, I didn't.
Jane: Yes, you did!
Me: Jane, I did not take the sombrero off your dog. I'm not lying to you.
Jane: I know you did it. I saw you. I have laser eyes. I can see through things.
148. I've been in Europe the past week, so I've been voice texting Jane.
Me: Hi Jane. I miss you very much, but I've visited three castles.
Jane: Did you see any princesses?
Me: No, I haven't seen any princesses, but I'll keep looking. I got you a present today.
Jane: Is it a toy, or something to eat, or something I will just love?
149. Me (to their cat, Ramsay): Ramsay, why are you climbing all over me? I've told you. I don't like cats.
Jane: Her Her, cats don't understand when people talk to them.
150. Jane does not like to fall down and scratch her knees (or any body part, really), and when there is a scratch that is pink, she thinks that is blood. So tonight at dinner, this happened several times. On the way home...
Jane: Why do I have so much blood? I've had enough blood today. Dad you actually need to carry me inside when we get home. Dad, why do we have blood in real life?
151. Jane has a vivid imagination. I have no imagination at all, so I find this whole realm of childhood fascinating. Lately, Jane has been playing Pokemon video games with Eli. In the middle of a game the other day, she set down her controller and picked up her play phone and proceeded to have a full-on conversation. At the end, she put her phone down, looked at her mom and me, and said:
Jane: A Pokemon trainer was calling me.
152. Jane also has her own "house" set up in a corner of their living room. It has blanket for a floor and all her various castles set up, creating the walls surrounding the "house." She sits in there and makes up stories, using her toys as characters and props. If you want to talk to her, you have to knock on the wall by the "house," which I did recently.
Me: (knock, knock, knock) on the wall.
Jane (with quizzical look on her face): Hmmmm. I wonder who that could be?
Jane (miming opening a door): Oh hi, Her Her!
153. Jane learned an inappropriate joke at her dance class, some sort of stupid bathroom "humor." She thought it was hilarious and told her mom.
Amanda: Oh, Jane, you should definitely tell Her Her that joke when she comes over tonight.
Jane: No, Mom. Her Her does not like p*** jokes.
154. Jane was in the middle of a dramatic sobbing monologue, and Amanda was explaining to her that no one is perfect (other than Jesus).
Jane: I wish I was the only perfect one like Jesus.
(Then, she stopped crying immediately and grinned):
Jane: Then everyone would call me Jesus Jane!
155. Amanda has a notebook where she writes to-do lists and other personal data she needs to keep track of. She also lets Jane write in it. Jane writes tiny, methodical scribbles, left-to-right on the page (prewriting!).
Jane: Her Her, would you like to see my notebook? Mommy and I both write in it.
Me: I'd love to, Jane!
Jane: Do you see where it is not real letters? That is me! I don't know how to make letters.
156. Jane drew a picture for her mom, but then she got frustrated and threw her markers across the room. When Amanda told her it's not okay to throw her markers when she's frustrated, Jane immediately found a way to retaliate. She took the picture she had drawn, got scissors out, and while glaring at Amanda, cut the picture in half.
Then, she was so upset that the cut the picture that she was sobbing in a meltdown! Thought her sobs, Amanda heard her lament:
Jane: Do I have a fairy mother to help me? No! Do I have a Pokemon to help me? No, because I don't live in a Pokemon world. Do I have Jesus to help me? No. Do I have anyone to help me with my picture? No!!
157. In other traumatic Jane news, she likes to watch a show called "Izzy's Koala World," where a girl helps her veterinarian mother raise baby koalas and then release them back into the wild. Last night, Jane was once again sobbing because she believes that she should have been born in Australia when she came into the world as a baby in Mommy's tummy. Because she needs to take care of things and she's supposed to be in Australia.