Need me some January love

The poet said, "April is the cruelest month." I disagree. It's January.

I'm whining. I know I am. Sorry. It's just that January is seriously the looooongest month of the year. I know. I know. It has 31 days just like seven other months do, but I mean really, is it still freakin' January?

Why do I hate this month so much? For starters, it's still cold. It's so very cold. Every day. All the time. It's cold. But it's no longer Christmas. Cold + no Christmas = suck. I'm pretty much cold everywhere I am. There's still snow covering the ground, snow that has been around for months. It never goes away; more just falls on top of it. I'm pretty sure it will never go away.

Second, there are no good holidays in January. Okay, I guess technically New Year's is in January, but that was so long ago I barely remember it, and it's really just and extension of Christmas, which is now completely over! Did I mention that Christmas is completely over?

Third, all my T.V. shows are on winter break. When I'm stuck in my house because I can't bear the thought of voluntarily going out in the bitter cold, I don't even have anything new to watch on T.V.

Fourth, I spent all my money in December, so I'm broke, and I can't even eat good food because I gained three pounds during the holidays, and Eli's wedding is just over two months away.

And last, the Utah inversion is kicking my trash. I can't stop coughing.

I'm whining. I know I am. Sorry. I am in dire need of an attitude adjustment. I need me some January love. Can you help? Why do you love January? Tell me, please!