You can't swing a dead cat...

...without hitting a mommy blogger.

Bahahhaha!

Here's the back story. As some of you know, I do some freelance writing for a site called Sidelines. I am a senior writer, and along with two other women, oversee the Parenting and Lifestyle Communities. A few months ago, the three of us were chatting with our managing editor about what kinds of contributors we would like to recruit, and someone mentioned "mommy bloggers." As soon as she said that, the other person said: "You can't swing a dead cat without hitting a mommy blogger."

As a prolific mommy blogger, myself, this statement cracked me up. So just yesterday, this stitched sign arrived in the mail. Once my Christmas decor is down, it will most definitely be framed and on display.

The statement, by the way, is absolutely true. And why wouldn't it be? As mommies, we love to talk about our kids. As writers, well, we love to write. The result: The Mommy Blogger! I am proud to be one of the many, and I'm grateful for all who read. It's such a treat when someone comes up to me, often someone I don't even really know, and tells me she enjoyed a particular post.

It's also a wonderful way to preserve family history, something I was never very good at pre-internet days. I now have six hardback books with all my posts from the past six years. Soon, I'll get to order the one for 2015.

So here's to another year of mommy blogging. Just don't swing any dead cats my way.

When will they say "He wanted pie!"?

Okay, the purpose of today's post is to record this for our family history, and this blog, for all intents and purposes, represents our family history. So if you're not interested in our little family quirks (and why would you be?), feel free to stop reading and join me again next post.

If you're still reading, remember, I warned you.

So the other day, Shulamith asked, "When you say 'He wanted pie!' in that song, did you just make that up? Because I've heard several different recordings of that song this week, and I keep waiting for them to say 'He wanted pie!' but they never do. So now I'm thinking you just made it up."

Well, yes, actually, I suppose I did. But it's very important. There are a couple traditions that go with Christmas songs that simply must be observed. Not to do so would be just wrong. One is during the song "(There's No Place Like) Home for the Holidays," right after the line that goes "I met a man who lived in Tennessee, and he was headin' for Pennsylvania and some homemade pumpkin pie," you have to shout "He wanted pie!" You just have to.

No, the recording artists who sing this song don't do it, but they should.

Second, whenever you hear the song "Winter Wonderland," in the very first line, when it says "Sleigh bells ring, are you listening?" you need to tilt your head slightly to the right and put your right hand up to your right ear, like you're listening. Every. Single. Time. Wherever you are.

So now you know. The next time you hear these songs, I'm counting on you.

Shout it loud: "He wanted pie!"

Head tilted to the right, hand to ear.

You've totally got this.

Vacations are temporal. But I'm still thankful for them.

Today in my Gospel Essentials class, we talked about the difference between eternal and temporal perspectives. My friend Lorraine mentioned that temporal things end. They are time sensitive, and eventually, no matter how much we like them, they end.

Vacations are like that. They're temporal. They always end. For many of us Erichsen-Websters, this past week has been full-on vacation mode. Gerald and Mathew still had to work, but for those of us involved in education, in the past five or six days, we have given little thought to school. And it's been lovely.

Eli and Amanda arrived Tuesday evening on break from BYU-Idaho in Rexburg. It was so great to have them both with us much of the week. Here they are at Temple Square:

Shulamith and I cooked most of Wednesday, in prep for Thursday's feast, so Thursday, itself, was mostly chill, filled with some Netflix binging (How much Survivor can you watch in one day, Eli and Amanda?), relaxing, and lots and lots of eating!

About twice a year, we actually all sit around the table and eat together, and Thanksgiving is one of those rare occasions. Here are some pics of my cute kids:

The Webster-Monsons

Isaiah and Seth, post-dinner Dominion game

These two, though. They don't look at all happy together, do they?

And then it happened. The cooking was over. The feast was finished. It was time. Time for an annual event that defines and culminates Thanksgiving weekend for Shulamith and me: Black Friday shopping! No judging allowed here. If you don't go to stores on Thanksgiving, that is totally great. But we do, and that is okay too. And this year, it wasn't even crowded. Did all the boycotts work? I don't know, but do you see the lack of humans in Target? We were in and out of three stores in just two hours, and we got exactly what we needed. Score!

Friday, we went to the mall to cross off a few more items from our list; all in all it was a productive and (most importantly) super fun Black Friday for the history books. That afternoon, I got to begin wrapping. On my list of very favorite things to do in the whole world, only a few trump wrapping Christmas gifts while listening to Christmas music and sipping a Diet Coke. 

Yesterday was tree trimming and house decorating, another favorite! I had plenty of wonderful help, whose names are Seth and Eli and Amanda. What about Isaiah, you might ask? Nope, he spent pretty much all of Friday and Saturday playing a videogame using his own Black Friday purchase: a Playstation 4. I don't know much about this game, but every time I took a minute or two to watch, he was chasing after people and shooting them, over and over. For a pacifist family like ours, who dislike just about everything gun related, he sure picks weird games.

Whatever. We didn't need him anyway. Look! We produced this thing of beauty:

Vacations, however wonderful, are temporal. All week, we joked about not returning to school. Eli and Amanda would just stay here and not go back to Rexburg. I would stay home with them, rather than going to class tomorrow. Shulamith, who teaches a college reading course two evenings a week, would not return either. But, of course, it was all pretend, a pleasant dream, because like all temporal things, vacations come to an end.

That is what happened today. Shortly after church, Eli and Amanda and her sweet brother braved the cold and the potentially icy roads and headed back to Rexburg. They are traveling right this second, and I will be a happy mom once I hear they arrived safely. Tomorrow they will return to school, as will I. 

As we enter into the grace of this miraculous season, may we be thankful for the temporal pleasures like vacations, while remembering the more important eternal blessings of One who came long ago to bring joy to the weary (which is all of us, really) and to make what seems impossible, possible.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Weekend of "Mom" moments: I cried. But you already guessed that.

It was a weekend of mom moments. For the past three months, Seth has been rehearsing for his part in the ensemble in his high school's production of the musical Carousel. He did not choose to participate; it's a requirement for students in Concert Choir. In the beginning, no one was more disgruntled about this situation than Seth. Not in a million years would he voluntarily spend that many hours of his free time at school singing and dancing. He complained a lot. A whole lot. He talked about how joyous November 23rd would be when the thing would finally be over.

Today is November 23rd. As I write, he is performing in this production for the last time. And he feels anything but joy about that. I can't say exactly when it happened, but at some point, a change occurred. Maybe it was gradual? I'm not sure. All I know is the rhetoric today was, "I'm so sad it's almost over. I've made so many friends; we are all gonna be sad. It's been so much fun!" Performing is like that, isn't it? The work is hard--the repeated rehearsals, the same thing over and over and over. But it's all so worth it when the curtain opens and the lights come up.

Probably no surprise to anyone, but I loved watching Seth perform. Shulamith and I had tickets for Thursday night, and I enjoyed it so much that I volunteered to usher Friday night, just so I could go again for free. My baby was absolutely adorable! Really, you should have seen him. I cried. But you already guessed that.

 Gerald went Saturday night. I was in Logan. Saturday was one of those days when I wished humans could be in multiple places at one time. Seth was performing in the musical, Shulamith was playing soccer, and Eli's choir "From the Heart" was touring up in Logan. Gerald went to the musical, his only opportunity to see it, and I went to Logan. I left first thing in the morning and got there in time to meet Eli for lunch. I love it when my kids are all together, but I also cherish the one-on-one time with each of them.

After lunch, I attended the choir's performance at a local nursing home. I can't say enough about this choir; it is consistently inspiring. When it was over, I left Eli and went to the Logan Temple, while the choir sang at another nursing home. That evening, I attended their fireside performance at the Logan Tabernacle, where I had the sweet surprise of Eli singing a solo, a beautiful arrangement of "There is a Balm in Gilead." I cried. But you already guessed that.

I drove home late that night, singing aloud to the Christmas music playing in the car. It was a weekend of "Mom" moments.

Too dependent?

Today, my cell phone broke. Well, more accurately, my touch screen broke. The phone still turns on and receives calls and text messages. I just can't access them. It's dang frustrating; I'm not gonna lie. Since this happened, I've received three texts from who knows whom? Gerald graciously gave me his phone to use. “You need it more than I do.” Yep, he's awesome like that. I immediately contacted my kids who text me regularly: “This is Mom. Until further notice, if you need me, text Dad. I have his phone.”

Okay, I breathe easier, knowing the most important people know how to get in touch with me. Gerald, though. He's running around phoneless, and I'm receiving all his notifications, so so many! He receives alerts from CNN for every last news event, large or small. Then he gets a bunch of other political stuff from various places along with weather notifications. The phone is constantly sounding, and I really hate his ring tone, and I don't know how to change it.

I know. I shouldn't be complaining. I should just be grateful he gave it to me. And I am. But it's caused me to ask myself, “Am I too dependent on this little device?” At least a dozen times in just this afternoon, I've tried to glance at Facebook, but couldn't because he doesn't have the app. Then I wanted to check my bank account. Nope, he doesn't have that one either. But if I wanted to know about the weather or the latest news or politics, ….okay, I'm complaining again.

Then it occurred to me that my calendar is in that phone, and no, I haven't backed it up anywhere. My calendar! I can't even imagine all the stuff I'm going to miss. My list of contacts, with addresses, is also there. I have a working draft of my annual Christmas letter that I'm liking more and more as I revise it each day, but I won't be able to send it out because I won't have anyone's address. Ugh.

There are worse things I could lose, and as I said, my kids know how to reach me, but this is still awfully inconvenient. What do you think? Are we too dependent on our cell phones?

And just like that, everything changed. So have some hot chocolate.

And just like that, everything changed. It's darker. It's colder. It's definitely fall with winter just around the corner. 

I rarely put recipes on this blog because I cook like crap, and I wouldn't want your families to be subjected to what my family has to eat. So you know if I do post a recipe, it must be really good. And easy. Incredibly easy.

Last Christmas morning, I woke up early, too excited to sleep, and the first thing I did was put this stuff in the crock pot. Then I went downstairs to the living room and sat on my couch. Outside, snow fell (yes, it really did!) gently. Inside, the lights from my tree glistened. I sat there listening to Josh Groban sing my favorite Christmas songs. 

Two hours-ish later, my family woke up to rich, yummy hot chocolate to sip as we opened our gifts. And now you, too, can have this same experience. I can't guarantee snow. I would if I could. But I can promise the most delicious hot chocolate ever: 

1 ½ C. heavy cream
1 C. sweetened condensed milk
6 C. whole milk
1 tsp. vanilla
2 C. chocolate chips
Put this all in the crock pot and stir. Turn crock pot to “low” for two hours. Stir once or twice as chips melt. Serve with marshmallows or whipped cream.

It really is that good. Enjoy!

Teens and post-teens and Halloween fun!

I've often said that if you decide to have a capstone child a few years younger than all the others, make sure you have one as wonderful as Seth. He is now 15, and that advice couldn't be any truer than it was when he was younger. Teenagers sometimes get a bad rap, but I am here to tell you that the teen years are some of my favorite in the parenting journey. Seth knew he'd be working on Halloween, so last Monday night he suggested we do a Halloween FHE: carve pumpkins, and watch "It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown." He and I share this tradition of watching all the Charlie Brown holiday specials together throughout the year. Two years ago for Christmas, he gave me a boxed set that includes three of these: Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas.

So Monday I bought pumpkins, and after his piano lesson, we settled in to watch poor Charlie Brown try to kick that fateful football and Linus wait so patiently and hopefully in that sincere pumpkin patch for the arrival of the Great Pumpkin. A post-Millennial (Generation Z?), Seth is always amused by the simplicity of older animation, but he is equally captivated by the brilliance of Charles M. Schulz. It was a delight!

Then we attacked the pumpkins! If you know me at all, you know that things like pumpkin carving (you know, anything that requires visual creativity or manual dexterity) will likely be a full-on disaster. So I don't aim high. I go with your standard triangles. Seth, on the other hand, is far more skilled and carved a Legend of Zelda design!

It was a lovely evening, made even better when some of my older kids started sending me pics of their respective Halloween excitement:

The Webster-Monsons at the ward Trunk-or-Treat party.

And here is Eli and his adorable girlfriend Amanda at their ward's party in Rexburg:

And here is Isaiah, who spent Halloween at an all-inclusive resort in Cancun, Mexico. He tells me he works hard when he's onsite at these events. Lounging in a hammock with a juice box. Hmmmm.

Happy Halloween 2015 from the Erichsen-Websters!