September always feels like a very long month, which is ironic because it has only 30 days. But January? Ugh! It just goes on and on and on. January, 2013 has been particularly cold; it has felt more like Billings, Montana than Salt Lake City, and many days have actually been colder here than in Billings. As a naturally cold person, I find it hard to get warm once I've been outside. Sometimes only a hot shower will do the trick, and I've taken many of what I call "power showers" this month. Their purpose is not to get clean, but to get warm! With the freezing temps and relentless snow, this month has lived up to its reputation for being the l-o-n-g-e-s-t month of the year.
Nevertheless, I have searched for and found (!) many good things to compensate for the weather and even one thing to embrace and rejoice about it. Let me tell you about them, in no particular order:
1. I made my very first loaf of homemade bread. Those of you who know me will understand how huge this is. I am not a cook. I am certainly not a baker. I'm just mom, who gives thanks daily that her children have not starved to death through the years. On my own, I would have never considered baking bread. But Shulamith is way braver than I am, and she did it one day while I was at school. The second I got home, she gave me a yummy slice of fresh, warm bread, and then she insisted that I make some myself. With her directing my every move, I did it. And it was delicious...like really! And easy. Shocking.
2. I have jumped back on the diet and exercise wagon after a very "off" holiday season. We have averaged 2 - 3 times a week at the gym, either taking classes or working out on our own. On the days we can't get there, we at least do mall-walking. Swen sometimes agrees to ride in his stroller, and when he won't, we figure we're burning more calories taking turns carrying an extra 20 pounds. I've been faithful to my low-fat eating routine, without a break, the entire month, and I can feel the results; most of those holiday pounds are thankfully gone. Can I tell you I'm sick of dieting, however?
3. We got to speak in church this past Sunday. We thought we weren't on the schedule until March, but the speakers for this week must have cancelled? Their loss - our gain! It was super fun, as always. Gerald spoke on "Good Works," and I spoke on "Kindness." Though we don't share our talks ahead of time, they complemented each other nicely. Will they still let us speak in March? Doubtful, but I can always dream.
4. Seth and I are reading the Book of Mormon together, using a computer-generated plan that divides the book into 365 equal sections. We LOVE it! The amount we read each day is so manageable, even for Seth, and that gives us time to discuss what we read. He claims he's going on a mission in 5/1/2 years (sigh), so this is great training.
5. I, finally, began letting Seth walk home from school occasionally. Since his accident, I've been scared to let him cross the street (80th S.) where he was hit. There is no crossing guard, and he was right inside the crosswalk when he was hit, so it's hard for me not to worry. I realize that I'm a crazy, anxious, over-the-top worry mom, but I think any mom (even normals ones) would feel my angst. Gerald drives Seth to school each morning, but a couple times this month, I've let him walk home. I make him text me before he crosses the street and then after he has crossed. Poor Seth.
6. I was thrilled to watch the inauguration of President Obama for his second term, and I have high expectations for the next four years. Already, I'm delighted with the steps he is taking toward gun reform laws and immigration reform. Hooray!
7. As of the end of January, Eli has been out on his mission 10 months. As we approach the half way mark, I continue to be thankful for his courage and commitment to his mission. He is doing great work and learning so much. I miss him. Lots. But his positive, spiritual, upbeat, funny letters each week are all I need to persevere through the next 14 months. Knowing how happy he is, how can I not be happy too?
8. Even in the snowy cold, last Sunday evening, Shulamith and I took a short walk to visit some friends who live a couple blocks around the corner from us. It was so quiet as the snow fell gently all around us. We breathed deeply and appreciated the loveliness! We had dressed for the weather, so we weren't even cold.
I won't lie. I'm beyond ready for January be be over in a couple days. I'm ready for warmer weather, but I know that's not likely just yet. In the meantime, will you join me in embracing each moment? Whatever the circumstances and whatever the weather, may we seek and find the good things that are everywhere.
And if need be, take a "Power Shower."
Wednesday, January 30, 2013
Tuesday, January 22, 2013
So Glad They Aren't Drug Addicts
Shulamith was telling me how proud she is of herself because she set the table for dinner twice this past week. Yes, twice! In one week! My response, "That's two more times than I did." I must confess that I am indeed a failure mom when it comes to family dinners, a total and complete failure. Every study I've ever read on the subject shows that family dinners are important (and I assume they mean dinners around a table, one that has been set). This practice provides opportunity for children to talk about their lives, their daily achievements and struggles, their hopes for the future. In fact, these studies show that children raised in a home with regular family dinners are way less likely to become involved with illegal drugs. It's true.
Knowing this, I'm pretty sure it's one of life's miracles of grace that not one of my five kids has become a drug addict. And I am so thankful. Though this post may seem lighthearted, I mean that sincerely. You see, I'm just terrible at family dinners. I think we might have done them more often when we lived in Washington, when Gerald worked days. But for the past eight years, he has worked swing shift, so he's not home for dinner. And I'm just a very casual person about food. As you already know, I'm a terrible cook. Well I'm no better at making a table look good. I had a friend in Washington who seriously enjoyed the process of setting a table more than she enjoyed the actual meal. I never understood this, but her tables were so elegant. However, when the food isn't all that great and the table doesn't look good either, it's hard to be motivated, despite all the evidence about how healthy and important family dinners are.
The seven years we were in Montana, I tried to do family dinners once a week on Sunday. Everyone was home that day, so we could all eat dinner together. No, I didn't exactly set the table; I let people get their own food and utensils from the kitchen. But we at least ate the meal together at the table once a week. Since moving to Utah, though, even the "once a week" deal has gone by the wayside. We generally eat in the same room (not always, but often) and around the same time. Some of us sit in the little TV nook adjacent to the kitchen; others roam around the large island bar or sit on a bar stool. And I have to say, I like it that way. The formal meal is not appealing to me. We still do it on holidays and when we have guests, but we have very few friends here, so guests are rare. Twice we've hosted the missionaries, and Mathew's parents have eaten here a few times, and we've used the table on those occasions. That's something, right?
The point is I'm just super glad my kids are not drug addicts despite my very obvious failure in this area.
Knowing this, I'm pretty sure it's one of life's miracles of grace that not one of my five kids has become a drug addict. And I am so thankful. Though this post may seem lighthearted, I mean that sincerely. You see, I'm just terrible at family dinners. I think we might have done them more often when we lived in Washington, when Gerald worked days. But for the past eight years, he has worked swing shift, so he's not home for dinner. And I'm just a very casual person about food. As you already know, I'm a terrible cook. Well I'm no better at making a table look good. I had a friend in Washington who seriously enjoyed the process of setting a table more than she enjoyed the actual meal. I never understood this, but her tables were so elegant. However, when the food isn't all that great and the table doesn't look good either, it's hard to be motivated, despite all the evidence about how healthy and important family dinners are.
The seven years we were in Montana, I tried to do family dinners once a week on Sunday. Everyone was home that day, so we could all eat dinner together. No, I didn't exactly set the table; I let people get their own food and utensils from the kitchen. But we at least ate the meal together at the table once a week. Since moving to Utah, though, even the "once a week" deal has gone by the wayside. We generally eat in the same room (not always, but often) and around the same time. Some of us sit in the little TV nook adjacent to the kitchen; others roam around the large island bar or sit on a bar stool. And I have to say, I like it that way. The formal meal is not appealing to me. We still do it on holidays and when we have guests, but we have very few friends here, so guests are rare. Twice we've hosted the missionaries, and Mathew's parents have eaten here a few times, and we've used the table on those occasions. That's something, right?
The point is I'm just super glad my kids are not drug addicts despite my very obvious failure in this area.
Friday, January 18, 2013
A Social Life in Utah - Is It Possible?
Well sort of. I think so. Hopefully.
To backtrack, let's just put it out there: I'm a social person, a true extrovert with a capital "E." I love being around people, lots of them or just a few. It is at the core of who I am. As an adult, I've lived in six different cities. When I first married, we lived in Hermiston, Oregon. From there, we moved to The Dalles, Oregon; then to Rohnert Park, California; then to Mt. Vernon, Washington; then to Billings, Montana; and now here. In those first five places, I always made friends easily. I didn't have to work at it or even consciously think about it; it just happened. I connected with people in our various wards and through activities my kids were involved in. It was easy. But it's been very different here in Utah. We've lived here exactly 1-1/2 years, and I can't say that I've made a single friend. It's so weird.
On the other hand, living in Utah provides some wonderful opportunities to connect with friends from the past. Just about everyone, it seems, comes to Salt Lake City. People visit family here. Others come here for weddings. Still others bring their kids to college or to the MTC. It's fabulous! Since moving here, I've enjoyed visits with many close friends from the past, including Trudy, Celeste, Lindsey, Mandy, Patty, and probably others I'm forgetting. I LOVE this!
Also, because of Eli's mission and the magic of Facebook connections, I've been able to meet new friends who live in other places and come here for some of the same reasons mentioned above. Over the holidays, we were able to go to dinner with Cheryl and Vince Longshore from Arlington, Tennessee. Eli is currently living in their home. How amazing it was to meet them and talk to them and especially to hear firsthand about our Elder Webster. Then just last week, we were able to meet and visit with Tom and Linda Boatman from Arizona, who were here briefly before reporting to the MTC en route to the Arkansas Little Rock Mission. So excited for them! They feel like forever friends, even though that was the first time we met in person.
So yeah, the social scene here is alive and well when it comes to people who don't actually live here. But I'd still like to make some sort of connections with those who do. So I decided to actively do something about that, rather than just complain. When I lived in Billings, several of us would meet weekly at McDonald's (because of the play area) and just chill, chat, and chew, while our kids played. It was one of the highlights of my week. So I thought "Why couldn't that work here?" I asked Shulamith what she thought about it, and she was down, so we started small and invited one person to join us for lunch this past Thursday at Burger King. Jennilyn not only agreed, but she invited one other person, Rachael. Yay!!! It was a super fun lunch with four of us hanging out and the kids playing. It made me really miss Lindsey and Celeste and Mandy, but I always miss them, so it's okay. And we're already planning to do it again next week. Success!
Could this be the start of a social life in Utah? Is it possible? Should I get my hopes up? Yes, I think I will. In the meantime, I'll continue to enjoy all the passers through, all of you who come to SLC just to visit, and also the fun new friends I'm meeting as a result of Eli's mission.
To backtrack, let's just put it out there: I'm a social person, a true extrovert with a capital "E." I love being around people, lots of them or just a few. It is at the core of who I am. As an adult, I've lived in six different cities. When I first married, we lived in Hermiston, Oregon. From there, we moved to The Dalles, Oregon; then to Rohnert Park, California; then to Mt. Vernon, Washington; then to Billings, Montana; and now here. In those first five places, I always made friends easily. I didn't have to work at it or even consciously think about it; it just happened. I connected with people in our various wards and through activities my kids were involved in. It was easy. But it's been very different here in Utah. We've lived here exactly 1-1/2 years, and I can't say that I've made a single friend. It's so weird.
On the other hand, living in Utah provides some wonderful opportunities to connect with friends from the past. Just about everyone, it seems, comes to Salt Lake City. People visit family here. Others come here for weddings. Still others bring their kids to college or to the MTC. It's fabulous! Since moving here, I've enjoyed visits with many close friends from the past, including Trudy, Celeste, Lindsey, Mandy, Patty, and probably others I'm forgetting. I LOVE this!
Also, because of Eli's mission and the magic of Facebook connections, I've been able to meet new friends who live in other places and come here for some of the same reasons mentioned above. Over the holidays, we were able to go to dinner with Cheryl and Vince Longshore from Arlington, Tennessee. Eli is currently living in their home. How amazing it was to meet them and talk to them and especially to hear firsthand about our Elder Webster. Then just last week, we were able to meet and visit with Tom and Linda Boatman from Arizona, who were here briefly before reporting to the MTC en route to the Arkansas Little Rock Mission. So excited for them! They feel like forever friends, even though that was the first time we met in person.
So yeah, the social scene here is alive and well when it comes to people who don't actually live here. But I'd still like to make some sort of connections with those who do. So I decided to actively do something about that, rather than just complain. When I lived in Billings, several of us would meet weekly at McDonald's (because of the play area) and just chill, chat, and chew, while our kids played. It was one of the highlights of my week. So I thought "Why couldn't that work here?" I asked Shulamith what she thought about it, and she was down, so we started small and invited one person to join us for lunch this past Thursday at Burger King. Jennilyn not only agreed, but she invited one other person, Rachael. Yay!!! It was a super fun lunch with four of us hanging out and the kids playing. It made me really miss Lindsey and Celeste and Mandy, but I always miss them, so it's okay. And we're already planning to do it again next week. Success!
Could this be the start of a social life in Utah? Is it possible? Should I get my hopes up? Yes, I think I will. In the meantime, I'll continue to enjoy all the passers through, all of you who come to SLC just to visit, and also the fun new friends I'm meeting as a result of Eli's mission.
Tuesday, January 8, 2013
"Have You Practiced the Piano?"
"Have you practiced the piano?" I've been asking this question nearly every day for as long as I can remember. Let's see. Isaiah started piano lessons when he was eight, and he is now 21, so it's been 13 years. It feels like longer. This must be every piano mom's least favorite part, trying to make sure they practice. It's hard. They don't want to. Well, maybe some do. Mine never have.
Then there's the issue of when (whether?) to let them quit altogether. Boy am I on the fence with this one. That's a strange feeling. In case you haven't noticed, I'm a pretty opinionated person. I have strong opinions on just about everything, so to say I'm straddling the fence on this issue is quite unusual. I really do see both sides.
My initial "gut" is to never make kids do extracurricular stuff if they don't want to. There are so many things they must do: go to school, get decent grades, learn manners, behave responsibly, complete their homework, share with their siblings, go to church, pay their tithing, attend seminary. The list goes on. So if they don't want to participate in sports, or join the chess club, or act in school plays, or run for student body office, or even play the piano, shouldn't it be their decision? Yeah, that's my "gut" feeling for sure. And I've stuck to that in nearly all situations. Luke, who played viola from 4th through 9th grades, decided to quit in his sophomore year of high school. It was difficult for him to fit in all the college-prep classes he wanted and still take orchestra, and he didn't love it enough to care. Should I have forced him to continue? I don't know. Does he regret quitting? I have no idea.
Shulamith studied classical dance starting at age 5. She was a beautiful ballerina, particularly lovely en pointe, but when she got to high school, she decided to give it up in order to become a cheerleader. Doing both was impossible; both demanded incredible amounts of time. I was sad. I tried to talk her out of it. But ultimately, I let her decide. She had a fun and successful tenure in cheer throughout high school, but I always wonder if I made the right decision. Does she regret quitting dance? She says yes.
Next comes Isaiah. At age 8, he began piano lessons. I still remember the short drive from our house to the teacher's house that first day. "Do you think I'll be famous?" he wanted to know. "You never know," I replied. He played through his sophomore year of high school, beautifully, if I may say so as his mom. He played a lovely arrangement of "We'll Bring the World His Truth" at Luke's mission farewell in 2006, but that would be his last performance. By then I was fighting the "practicing battles," and it became more than I could tackle. He was a good sight-reader, so he could fake his way through lessons sometimes, but finally, we both came to the place where it needed to be over. "If you don't want to practice, I don't want to pay for lessons." He didn't want to practice. He was delighted to be done. Even his teacher agreed. He has played on his own from time to time since, but not much. Does he regret quitting formal training? He says no.
Eli began piano lessons when he was 10, and he continued all the way through high school. Did he always want to practice? No. But he always wanted to play. Always. If I even suggested that we would have to stop lessons, he'd get motivated right quick and start practicing lots. It paid off. In 2011, when he graduated from high school, he also had his senior piano recital. It was joyous to see his accomplishment, the reward that comes from so many years of hard work and dedication. Even better, though, is the reward we see now. As most of you know, he's serving a church mission in Arkansas. He spent his first six months in a tiny town called Blytheville. His ward had about 20 active members, none of whom could play the piano. They piped in organ music for Sacrament Meeting, but Eli played piano for almost all their other meetings. How wonderful that he could use his skill to serve in this way.
So yeah, I mostly think kids should be allowed to choose their own extracurricular activities. Mostly. But there is clearly another side to the issue, one that makes sense too. I think it's best summed up with this statement:
"I'm so glad my mom let me quit taking piano lessons when I was little," said no adult ever!
And that brings us to Seth, the fifth and final child. He started piano lessons just over a year ago. He progressed faster than either of his older brothers. Really, he seems to have a natural aptitude for this. He soars through books so quickly, I feel like I need to buy stock in the music store. Last week, his teacher asked me if we could extend his weekly lessons to 45 minutes, rather than 30, because his rapid progression requires more time. Okay, fine. Absolutely. Whatever he needs. However, I'm fighting the "practicing battles" as never before. Even though he's extremely successful at piano, he complains about it constantly and wants to quit. He tells me I am wasting my money and I should just give it to him instead. Hmmm.
For now, I've decided to break my past pattern and insist that he continue. I've talked to him about the importance of developing the talents we are blessed with, and I really feel this is one of those. Also, Seth doesn't participate in any other extracurricular activity. I think he can do this one thing. Am I wrong? I'd be interested to hear your opinions. Meanwhile, for the twenty-billionth time, I'll ask:
"Have you practiced the piano?"
Then there's the issue of when (whether?) to let them quit altogether. Boy am I on the fence with this one. That's a strange feeling. In case you haven't noticed, I'm a pretty opinionated person. I have strong opinions on just about everything, so to say I'm straddling the fence on this issue is quite unusual. I really do see both sides.
My initial "gut" is to never make kids do extracurricular stuff if they don't want to. There are so many things they must do: go to school, get decent grades, learn manners, behave responsibly, complete their homework, share with their siblings, go to church, pay their tithing, attend seminary. The list goes on. So if they don't want to participate in sports, or join the chess club, or act in school plays, or run for student body office, or even play the piano, shouldn't it be their decision? Yeah, that's my "gut" feeling for sure. And I've stuck to that in nearly all situations. Luke, who played viola from 4th through 9th grades, decided to quit in his sophomore year of high school. It was difficult for him to fit in all the college-prep classes he wanted and still take orchestra, and he didn't love it enough to care. Should I have forced him to continue? I don't know. Does he regret quitting? I have no idea.
Shulamith studied classical dance starting at age 5. She was a beautiful ballerina, particularly lovely en pointe, but when she got to high school, she decided to give it up in order to become a cheerleader. Doing both was impossible; both demanded incredible amounts of time. I was sad. I tried to talk her out of it. But ultimately, I let her decide. She had a fun and successful tenure in cheer throughout high school, but I always wonder if I made the right decision. Does she regret quitting dance? She says yes.
Next comes Isaiah. At age 8, he began piano lessons. I still remember the short drive from our house to the teacher's house that first day. "Do you think I'll be famous?" he wanted to know. "You never know," I replied. He played through his sophomore year of high school, beautifully, if I may say so as his mom. He played a lovely arrangement of "We'll Bring the World His Truth" at Luke's mission farewell in 2006, but that would be his last performance. By then I was fighting the "practicing battles," and it became more than I could tackle. He was a good sight-reader, so he could fake his way through lessons sometimes, but finally, we both came to the place where it needed to be over. "If you don't want to practice, I don't want to pay for lessons." He didn't want to practice. He was delighted to be done. Even his teacher agreed. He has played on his own from time to time since, but not much. Does he regret quitting formal training? He says no.
Eli began piano lessons when he was 10, and he continued all the way through high school. Did he always want to practice? No. But he always wanted to play. Always. If I even suggested that we would have to stop lessons, he'd get motivated right quick and start practicing lots. It paid off. In 2011, when he graduated from high school, he also had his senior piano recital. It was joyous to see his accomplishment, the reward that comes from so many years of hard work and dedication. Even better, though, is the reward we see now. As most of you know, he's serving a church mission in Arkansas. He spent his first six months in a tiny town called Blytheville. His ward had about 20 active members, none of whom could play the piano. They piped in organ music for Sacrament Meeting, but Eli played piano for almost all their other meetings. How wonderful that he could use his skill to serve in this way.
So yeah, I mostly think kids should be allowed to choose their own extracurricular activities. Mostly. But there is clearly another side to the issue, one that makes sense too. I think it's best summed up with this statement:
"I'm so glad my mom let me quit taking piano lessons when I was little," said no adult ever!
And that brings us to Seth, the fifth and final child. He started piano lessons just over a year ago. He progressed faster than either of his older brothers. Really, he seems to have a natural aptitude for this. He soars through books so quickly, I feel like I need to buy stock in the music store. Last week, his teacher asked me if we could extend his weekly lessons to 45 minutes, rather than 30, because his rapid progression requires more time. Okay, fine. Absolutely. Whatever he needs. However, I'm fighting the "practicing battles" as never before. Even though he's extremely successful at piano, he complains about it constantly and wants to quit. He tells me I am wasting my money and I should just give it to him instead. Hmmm.
For now, I've decided to break my past pattern and insist that he continue. I've talked to him about the importance of developing the talents we are blessed with, and I really feel this is one of those. Also, Seth doesn't participate in any other extracurricular activity. I think he can do this one thing. Am I wrong? I'd be interested to hear your opinions. Meanwhile, for the twenty-billionth time, I'll ask:
"Have you practiced the piano?"
Sunday, January 6, 2013
WHAT??????????????????????????????
Seth attends a middle school that includes grades 7 - 9, so he is among the youngest kids there (perhaps one of the very youngest with his June 14th birthday). So last night Gerald and I were talking with him casually about school, friends, church, life in general. It was one of those quiet times with just the three of us sprawled across various places on our queen-sized bed. We had just read our nightly installment of the Book of Mormon, right on schedule with our goal to read the entire book this year.
Somehow the conversation moved to Seth's social life, and the following conversation ensued:
Seth: I think I must be kinda mature for my age.
Mom: Why do you say that?
Seth: Well, all the guys in my Young Men's are 14, and they like to hang out with me. They're my best buds.
Mom: That's true. They are nice boys. I'm glad they are your friends. I think it's because you've been raised in a house full of teenagers ever since you were born. You've never had anyone here even close to your age.
Seth: And even at school, most of my friends are older, the 8th and 9th graders.
Dad: But I don't imagine any of the ninth-grade girls are interested in you.
Seth: Unfortunately, no.
WHAT?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
Somehow the conversation moved to Seth's social life, and the following conversation ensued:
Seth: I think I must be kinda mature for my age.
Mom: Why do you say that?
Seth: Well, all the guys in my Young Men's are 14, and they like to hang out with me. They're my best buds.
Mom: That's true. They are nice boys. I'm glad they are your friends. I think it's because you've been raised in a house full of teenagers ever since you were born. You've never had anyone here even close to your age.
Seth: And even at school, most of my friends are older, the 8th and 9th graders.
Dad: But I don't imagine any of the ninth-grade girls are interested in you.
Seth: Unfortunately, no.
WHAT?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
Thursday, January 3, 2013
Ready? Or Not?
Nope, I'm not talking about the age-old childhood game, hide-and-seek. I'm talking about "getting ready," that is showering, dressing, applying make-up, styling hair. Or not. At least not if you don't have to go anywhere. I've decided that people (well women, I should say, because I haven't really discussed this with men) fall into two groups: the "get up and get ready, no matter what" group, and the "get ready only if necessary" group.
My friend Lindsey falls into the former group. I don't think I've ever seen her not "ready." I believe that every morning, regardless of what she does or does not have scheduled that day, she gets up, showers, puts on cute clothes, and does her makeup and hair beautifully. She is always "ready." She is not the only one. My friend Trudy also fits in this group. Her theory is, "I want to be 'ready' in case something comes up." I had a friend in Mt. Vernon, also a member of the "ready no matter what" group. She not only got herself "ready" every day, but she insisted that her kids do the same. I remember her saying to them, "You have to get 'ready' for your day."
I am not a member of that group. I am queen of the "ready only if necessary" group. Is this bad? I heard a talk recently, where the speaker insisted that if we want to feel good about ourselves, it's critical that we get up and get "ready" every morning, regardless of what the day has in store for us. She maintained that not doing so could compromise our self-esteem. Hmmm. I wonder. I think my self-esteem is okay. For me, lounging in pajamas, with no shower, make-up, or styled hair, is the epitome of luxury. When I was a little girl, my mom and I would plan such days. "I need a pajama day," one of us would say, and we would plot out a time when we could remain in pajamas the entire day. No, we didn't do this often. Of course not! I had school and other activities. She had various responsibilities. But it was a lovely occasional treat.
Shulamith and I will sometimes plan such a day, and I love those days just as much as when I was little. Apart from those special days, however, I'm still a member of the "ready only if necessary" group. When I get up in the morning, I don't do anything to get ready until an hour before I need to leave to go somewhere. Sometimes I even wait until 45 minutes before, but then I have to rush, which I don't like. On the three days a week that I teach, my first class begins at 11:10. I leave home around 10:45, which means I get in the shower at 9:45. Before that, I lounge happily in pajamas and do whatever. Housework, cooking, paper grading, blogging, reading, etc. all can be done just fine in the comfort of sweet PJ's.
Not only that, but I love pajamas so much that the second I get home from wherever I went, I immediately switch back into pajamas. Even if I know I'm going somewhere else later, it's worth it to change and then change back. That's how much I like to be in pajamas. But sometimes life takes an unexpected turn, and I have to leave immediately with no warning. What then?
It's very bad. One recent example was the morning I received the terrifying phone call telling me Seth had been hit by a car while walking to school. Of course, I gave no thought to appearances and instead grabbed my big "Montana coat" from my closet and threw it on over my PJ's as I bolted out the door. This coat is not attractive. Let me be clear about that. It is so long that it goes all the way down to my ankles, and it has no shape whatsoever, just straight up and down. Shulamith hates it; in fact, one time she put it on just to demonstrate how bad it is: "See, this is what you look like when you wear this!" But it is wonderfully warm, and I couldn't have survived those freezing Montana winters without it. And it comes in really handy when you need to be covered up from neck to toes, such as when you decide to venture out into the world wearing pajamas, as I did that morning.
Admittedly, I've used it as a pajama cover-up on other occasions. Three days ago on New Year's Eve, we decided impulsively to go to Cheesecake Factory for dessert at 10:30. It had been a quiet day (read: I didn't need to go anywhere, so of course I had not showered, dressed, or done hair and make-up). Yep, I really did it! I put on my Montana coat, and off we went. Keep in mind that living here in Utah, the chances I would encounter someone I knew were incredibly low. Moreover, I'm pretty sure no one would recognize me anyway, wearing this giant coat, bed-head hair, and zero makeup. This worked so well that a couple days later I decided to try it again. I didn't have any significant place to go; I just needed a couple items from the grocery store. Donned in the big coat over pajamas, I headed out to the store, and I'm pretty sure no one was the wiser. Seriously, all you can see is 'coat' when I'm wearing that thing. Well, here, let me show you:
So now I'm wondering about all you other friends out there. Into which group do you belong? Ready? Or not?
My friend Lindsey falls into the former group. I don't think I've ever seen her not "ready." I believe that every morning, regardless of what she does or does not have scheduled that day, she gets up, showers, puts on cute clothes, and does her makeup and hair beautifully. She is always "ready." She is not the only one. My friend Trudy also fits in this group. Her theory is, "I want to be 'ready' in case something comes up." I had a friend in Mt. Vernon, also a member of the "ready no matter what" group. She not only got herself "ready" every day, but she insisted that her kids do the same. I remember her saying to them, "You have to get 'ready' for your day."
I am not a member of that group. I am queen of the "ready only if necessary" group. Is this bad? I heard a talk recently, where the speaker insisted that if we want to feel good about ourselves, it's critical that we get up and get "ready" every morning, regardless of what the day has in store for us. She maintained that not doing so could compromise our self-esteem. Hmmm. I wonder. I think my self-esteem is okay. For me, lounging in pajamas, with no shower, make-up, or styled hair, is the epitome of luxury. When I was a little girl, my mom and I would plan such days. "I need a pajama day," one of us would say, and we would plot out a time when we could remain in pajamas the entire day. No, we didn't do this often. Of course not! I had school and other activities. She had various responsibilities. But it was a lovely occasional treat.
Shulamith and I will sometimes plan such a day, and I love those days just as much as when I was little. Apart from those special days, however, I'm still a member of the "ready only if necessary" group. When I get up in the morning, I don't do anything to get ready until an hour before I need to leave to go somewhere. Sometimes I even wait until 45 minutes before, but then I have to rush, which I don't like. On the three days a week that I teach, my first class begins at 11:10. I leave home around 10:45, which means I get in the shower at 9:45. Before that, I lounge happily in pajamas and do whatever. Housework, cooking, paper grading, blogging, reading, etc. all can be done just fine in the comfort of sweet PJ's.
Not only that, but I love pajamas so much that the second I get home from wherever I went, I immediately switch back into pajamas. Even if I know I'm going somewhere else later, it's worth it to change and then change back. That's how much I like to be in pajamas. But sometimes life takes an unexpected turn, and I have to leave immediately with no warning. What then?
It's very bad. One recent example was the morning I received the terrifying phone call telling me Seth had been hit by a car while walking to school. Of course, I gave no thought to appearances and instead grabbed my big "Montana coat" from my closet and threw it on over my PJ's as I bolted out the door. This coat is not attractive. Let me be clear about that. It is so long that it goes all the way down to my ankles, and it has no shape whatsoever, just straight up and down. Shulamith hates it; in fact, one time she put it on just to demonstrate how bad it is: "See, this is what you look like when you wear this!" But it is wonderfully warm, and I couldn't have survived those freezing Montana winters without it. And it comes in really handy when you need to be covered up from neck to toes, such as when you decide to venture out into the world wearing pajamas, as I did that morning.
Admittedly, I've used it as a pajama cover-up on other occasions. Three days ago on New Year's Eve, we decided impulsively to go to Cheesecake Factory for dessert at 10:30. It had been a quiet day (read: I didn't need to go anywhere, so of course I had not showered, dressed, or done hair and make-up). Yep, I really did it! I put on my Montana coat, and off we went. Keep in mind that living here in Utah, the chances I would encounter someone I knew were incredibly low. Moreover, I'm pretty sure no one would recognize me anyway, wearing this giant coat, bed-head hair, and zero makeup. This worked so well that a couple days later I decided to try it again. I didn't have any significant place to go; I just needed a couple items from the grocery store. Donned in the big coat over pajamas, I headed out to the store, and I'm pretty sure no one was the wiser. Seriously, all you can see is 'coat' when I'm wearing that thing. Well, here, let me show you:
So now I'm wondering about all you other friends out there. Into which group do you belong? Ready? Or not?
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