Nothin' left to do but put me in a "home."

Shulamith has repeatedly said that when Seth leaves for his mission, she will put me in a "home." She has no desire to deal with me in this distraught state of mind, so as the mission approaches, she has been checking out possible options for where to put me. She says the nurses will like me because I can take care of myself, and they won't have to do anything.

She's only partly kidding. And who can blame her?

This morning, my friend Lacey texted to ask how I was doing: "Are you holding up okay?" I replied mostly in the affirmative, explaining how my emotions shift, sometimes hourly. I can be so excited for Seth one minute, but then out of nowhere, remember how long he will be gone and flip right into full-on ugly crying.

Which is exactly what happened this morning at McDonald's. As I was standing in line, I happened to notice this particular table, a small round one with two chairs. Once several years ago, a power line broke near our house, and we were without electricity for most of an evening. Now most families would gather flashlights and candles and hunker down with blankets and wait it out, but not Seth and I. Nope. We hopped in the car and headed straight to McDonald's and sat at this little round table with two chairs. We go to McDonald's almost daily, so I've seen that exact table dozens of times since, but today, oh my goodness! The memory of sitting there with Seth that night so long ago sent me right over the edge.

I guess we we should also talk about why I was inside McDonald's in the first place. I'm losing my mind. For real. I ran out first thing this morning to get cash from the ATM because Shulamith and I were getting our hair done, and our stylist doesn't have Venmo or take cards. I got the cash and drove through McDonald's to get my signature Egg White Delight and headed home. As I pulled into Chevron to grab a Diet Coke, I noticed that I had no McDonald's bag and no food. Yep, I totally paid for my Egg White Delight but forgot to stop at the second window and pick it up.

I drove back to McDonald's and this time went inside to ask if by chance they still had my Egg White. They did, but that's when I saw the table. So the cashier at McDonald's not only thinks I'm a lunatic for buying food but failing to pick it up; he also thinks I'm an emotional nut case.

Nothin' left to do but put me in a "home."

After getting our hair done, Shulamith and I were headed out to get lunch, but my purse was nowhere. I thought I brought it out to the car, but I was carrying her baby, so maybe not? But then it wasn't in the house either. After a few moments of frustration and strife, I saw it sitting in the middle of the driveway. How did it get there? No idea.

Later this evening, I was hungry again and wanting some pho. When I saw an empty bag of Wendy's food on the table next to Isaiah, I asked, "Did you bring food home from work and eat already? Cuz I was hoping we could go get pho." He looked at me like I was crazy (which by now, we all know I am) and said, "Uh, it's Saturday. I didn't go to work. I've literally been sitting here watching the DotA tournament all day. This is from lunch five hours ago."

Okay, fine. Yes. I forgot it was the weekend. A simple mistake anyone could make, right?

Seth and Isaiah and I ate some yummy pho at one of our favorite places, paid the bill, and started toward home. Suddenly, it occurred to me that my purse was way too light. My wallet was missing. "Isaiah, stop! Go back." He turned around and went back, and, sure enough, there was my wallet, lying wide open on the counter where we had paid.

So this is my life, the life of a highly emotional, mentally deranged mama, preparing to send her very last baby to South America for 730 days. Lacey, thanks for asking how I'm holding up. If you or anyone else who loves me wants to see me after August 28th, you'll probably need to visit me at the "home."

Ask Shulamith for the address.